(no subject)

[printfogey.livejournal.com]

Title: Can’t Let Go
Rating: G
Media: fic
Character: Zoro
Word Count: 300
Prompt: Fear
Author’s notes: Some people make their peace with the past. Others prefer not to.
Set right after the end of Thriller Bark. Critical comments quite welcome.



He’s seen an orange-haired girl in a strawhat nod and sniffle “Sure” in response to her captain’s declaration; then later watched as she jumped aboard, loaded with wallets.

He’s seen pink snow gently float down like cherry blossom petals over a wintry kingdom, and has felt the touch of rain coming to the desert kingdom at last.

He’s come to know at least a small part of the darkness that Robin has carried around, and has seen her finally defy it to cry out her will to live.

He’s watched Merry burned down with all of them, standing right next to Usopp for whom the ship was his link back home.

He’s seen Franky cry his goodbyes to an entire town as his old friend sets him straight and he’s able to forgive himself his past.

And yesterday he was sitting by Brook’s side in Thriller Bark in front of a newly-dug grave, his body aching and his mind at peace, saying a silent goodbye to Yubashiri as Brook does the same with his old crew.


Those are great, good things. For them.


But he remembers when he last saw that Marine woman, when she pushed her glasses back and challenged him again. He recalls bright young eyes, glittering of supreme skill and darkening in yearning envy… the goddamn bitter unfairness of it all, as he made the only possible choice he could, grabbing hold of his promise and never letting go.

The thought that somehow he might fail her, might betray her by losing his hold on her before reaching their dream, is intolerable. And deeply frightening.

So he knows the next time he sees that Marine woman, Tashigi, he’ll probably still prefer to bolt rather than face her. Because that's the one fear he’s afraid to master.

Comments

[printfogey.livejournal.com]

Hmm, that sounds thoughtful. ^_^

[slaughterchichi.livejournal.com]

Wow. I kind of know what you mean here, because I don't think Zoro's going to be able to face Tashigi properly either. I liked how you started with all the amazing things and then let it dwindle to that one final thought.

[printfogey.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

Yeah, I could be wrong about this, since it's been a long time since Alabasta and Zoro has been through a lot since then... but this is how I see it.

[alice-and-lain.livejournal.com]

Wow, lots of food for thought with this one. How each of the Straw Hats have their past resolved, somewhat, but Zoro doesn't at all. And that he runs from Tashigi because he's afraid of losing Kuina. Great drabble! I love it when people write Zoro, I have such a poor grasp on him that I need others to show me deeper facets to his character.

[printfogey.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Yeah, Zoro is different from the others, because his dream isn't just based on his past but comes directly from the pain and grief of it. Most of the other characters have had to overcome trauma in order to feel free to join Luffy and pursue their dreams, but Zoro's different. (Usopp's an exception too, but in another way.)

Luffy himself is kinda like Zoro in part, but for him Shanks' sacrifice drives him on because (I think) he needs to prove himself worthy of it.

I'm not sure I have a good grasp of Zoro myself - I feel I'm often guessing, when it comes to him. Reading good fanfics, essays and thoughtful fan discussions have given me a much better understanding of Zoro's character than I had before getting into the fandom, when I was just a manga reader. This goes for all the characters, really, but it's especially the case with him, for me. Good analyses by others have made me notice things that were there all the time in the manga but I didn't pick up on, and then when I go back and re-read I can see it, and also notice things by myself.

[dethorats]

This was marvelous! I really like the point you make in this, about Zoro not really getting his past addressed in any way beyond Tashigi and how that relates to his ongoing concerns with Kuina.

The language you used was lovely, btw.

[printfogey.livejournal.com]

Man, thanks awfully. I feel I'm guessing a lot here in trying to analyse Zoro's Tashigiphobia, but this is how it came out. Of course, it's hard to really know if Zoro still feels that way, after 485 and all, but absent any counter-evidence...

It is pretty interesting to ponder both similarities and differences in everyone's pasts. I think Luffy and Zoro are the only ones whose dreams are directly powered by their childhood traumas (although maybe it's true for Robin as well...?) But Luffy isn't grieving for anyone.